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Cathie from Canada

Remember that phrase from the 60s "I've been down so long it looks like up to me."
Its very easy to get lulled into a state where you just cannot believe that anything is seriously wrong -- when I got sick the summer of 2016, and didn't eat for 2 months, I was literally starving to death without realizing what was happening. And neither did my husband. I saw my doctor regularly and she didn't think anything serious was wrong either, even when I had an attack of diverticulitis. In retrospect, we were all delusional. I actually thought I was recovering, bit by bit, just really slow, and I kept telling my doctor this too. Actually, I was drifting away. I remember thinking maybe I was dying but not really caring. Finally in September the doctor's office weighed me and found I had lost 70 pounds in 2 months. It was only then that I finally demanded that SOMETHING had to be done and my doctor referred me to the hospital. Surgery followed -- three, actually, the most recent was this June. It wasn't cancer, though everyone thought it would be. It was actually "just" bowel obstructions in two places, complicated by inflammation throughout my gut. Doctors didn't have any explanation about why this happened to me (though I blame a car accident 10 years ago). Recovery after that first surgery took weeks -- I had been without protein for so long that my legs were all swollen up and I could hardly walk, so I was 7 weeks in hospital before I could manage the stairs at home.
So don't blame yourself for not figuring out that something serious was wrong with Mrs M.
The important thing is that you stuck by her through it all, you didn't give up on her even when it seemed like her misery would never end.
I will never forget how much my husband helped me get through the last 2 years, I simply could not have managed without him. It wasn't so much anything he did, but just that he was THERE, always in my corner, always with me, always fighting for me.
I'm sure Mrs M feels the same way about you.

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