Dear Gun Nuts, Uncle Sam needs you!

Dear Gun Nuts,

When you argue that to prevent future Newtown-like massacres teachers need to be armed, can we presume you mean with handguns?  You aren’t picturing  them teaching kids their ABC’s with the butts of their Bushmasters propped on their hips, are you?

Doesn’t matter.

We know you’re projecting. You’re really boasting. If you had been at Sandy Hook last Friday, you’re telling us, packing your trustiest semi-automatic, you’d have stopped Adam Lanza dead in his tracks.

You’d have seen him coming, known at a glance what he was there for, drawn your weapon before he could level his rifle at you, and shot first and shot accurately.   Which means you believe you are very good at things most cops and many Marines are barely proficient at after years of training.

So I have a question for you.

If you are that skilled and that brave, why aren’t you a Marine? Why aren’t you a cop? We could use a hero like you in Afghanistan.  Imagine how safe our city streets would be if the likes of you was on patrol every night.

Actually, don’t bother to answer.  We know why.

Because you know you aren’t really a hero.  You’re just compensating with your boasting and gun-waving.  You know and we know you’re a coward and a weakling and that if you had been at Sandy Hook you’d have been pressed into a corner, weeping, while the principal and the psychologist, two middle-aged women, one a grandmother, the other looking forward to becoming one, went out into the hall to try to stop Adam Lanza armed only with their courage and their love for the kids in their charge.

_________________________

Then there’s this guy. Dennis Richardson. He’s a Vietnam vet and should know better. But entering his dotage he apparently believes he can do things he couldn’t do back when he was a young helicopter pilot, like dodge bullets like Nemo in The Matrix.  He’d be pathetic if he wasn’t a member of the Oregon state legislature! That makes him scary.

Note to any members of the Washington Press Corps who might come across this.  Richardson and his kind are the Republican Party, not that polite people in expensive suits who buy you lunch and drinks and assure you the establishment types have the lunatics like him under control.

Thanks to Jesse Taylor and Amanda Marcotte.

Comments

[Lorettadillon]

Years ago, 2002, 2003, I read RW blogs that were not entirely insane, like they are now. I read a thoughtful essay on the 2nd amendment that almost converted me from an anti-gun person to one who understood the premise of their argument. However, I am unapologetic about blaming, in part, the parents of these children (Columbine, Sandy Hook) for owning assault weapons or ignoring all the obvious signs that their kids were disturbed, sociopathic or plotting murder. I'd have to be in a coma not to see this in one of my children.