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"I don't need the new movies to be that faithful to the series."

No, but one might expect logic to prevail. Nothing against Uhura having a love life, but why a (supposedly) unemotional Vulcan? Does that not defy logic? I never thought about the time travel implications, but I am sure that the discussion can be had along your lines.

What really bugs me are two things - first, why does every "planet-busting" technology have to work within seconds? You're talking about an incredibly big mass, and even if you perfected a black hole weapon system, it takes time to nibble away at mass. Absolutely no planetary defense system? Bah.

Second, at the end of the movie... (minor spoiler ahead)
I get to see James T. Kirk plop his ass down in the captain's chair. Wow! so Starfleet HQ decided that JT was so hot, he could just skip through the traditional 15-18 year period of working up through the ranks to become a ship's commander. I thought it was beyond heresy for the director to end the first "new" ST movie with "and that's how Jimmie got his first ship, the Enterprise." Why didn't they send him to be a security officer under some other captain? Maybe Captain Christopher Pike?

Bleh. I will not buy this DVD, although I have all of the original ST movies (ST:NG had maybe one good movie).



If only you were as concerned with the narrative provenance of your Constitution.



I'm just getting warmed up. The Uhura-Greenblooded Hobgoblin romance bugged me too, especially since Zoe Saldana seems to have way more going on with Chris Pine than she does with Zachary Quinto. (God save us from a future Spock-Uhura-Kirk triangle subplot in a future movie!) But I didn't work into this post something about the way the movie actually plays fast and loose with time. It's true that in the series Starship captains were usually and purposefully grizzled veterans, Pike and Kirk being the two exceptions (and the movie advances Pike's age so maybe it's only Kirk) and Kirk's promotion to captain was rushed for some reason besides Kirk's being brilliant---not necessarily Pike's terrible injuries, but maybe. However, the movie leaves open the possibility that the last scene on the bridge is taking place several years after the main events of the movie. At any rate, I was bothered by that too, but unless the next movie closes off the possibility, I'm going to pretend that those years have passed and Kirk did put in his time as a junior officer on other ships.

Ken Houghton

Uh, Uhura always had a sex life (and I don't just mean getting raped in The Gamesters of Triskelion and kissing Spock in the "Lenny needs a single from his second album" episode). Remember her response to, iirc, Captain Kevin Thomas Riley's "Ah, fair maiden"--Sorry, neither!"

Also, if Kirk skipped all those midshipman days, how do he and Spock get described as "uncommon workmen" by Edith Keeler--James Blish was explicit in _ST 2_ that Kirk thought back to those days as she said it. (Don't remember the exact quote.)

One of these days, I have to see the movie. For now, I'll just live by Michael Swanwick's wisecrack:

"Am I supposed to find it moving that Spock is willing to to risk the destruction of Earth and everybody on it just so that his younger self and Kirk can become friends?

No wonder they write Slash about these guys."

Chris G.

If you look at some of the earliest episodes of Trek, there are some hints at a flirtation between Uhura and Spock. I think it's in Charlie X that she sings a song about, essentially, how intriguing ladies find Spock, and Spock's response is a quizzical expression into which one could read volumes. So given a slightly different history I don't think a relationship between them is beyond the pale.

On Kirk's rapid promotion: Wasn't most of Starfleet wiped out at Vulcan? If the admirals are looking around and most of their experienced command officers are dead, they might well decide to take a flyer on the guy who saved Earth.

(Unrelated to anything, I appreciated how the film was structured so that we didn't see Kirk in his proper uniform tunic until the very last scene.)


Can I also pimp my follow-up post?

Anne Laurie

I was an almost-first-generation Trekkie (started watching as soon as it hit syndication) and I have to say this for ST:REBOOT -- it finally gave me a Kirk I could believe in. Back in the 1970s, I never got a better explanation of Kirk's purported awesomeness than "Well, he's just *S*p*e*c*i*a*l*, you just have to understand" (usually with the subtext "... which you would, if you weren't a guuuurl"). But part of the changes over the last three decades means that JJ Abrams can give us a James Tiberius Kirk with ADHD -- which makes a lot more sense of both his talents and his considerable flaws. Of course ADHD Kirk blows shit up, throws himself into situations where he has no business being in the first place, and tries to hump every member of the oppposite sex he meets -- he's got brain chemistry issues. And of course ADHD Kirk attracts a loyal cadre, even after it's obvious being a cadre member has a high mortality rate; one reason the ADHD gene-set has not been eliminated is that people will follow crazy-charismatic ADHDers into the mouth of death, if only because they're curious to see what'll happen next.

On the other hand, maybe I am an old cynic, but the overt Spock/Uhura PDAs just made me wonder if the suits hadn't demanded some kind of blatant "Spock Likes The Ladies" footage to counteract the pre-release rumors about the actor's sexual orientation. Those two were my favorite characters, and I could totally believe a relationship between them, but NOT that either one would grope each other in front of other people, if only because both characters were supposed to be far more cognizant of workplace protocol than the guys in the yellow shirts.


Dutch: If only you were as concerned with the narrative provenance of your Constitution.

In the original series, the Enterprise was a Constitution-class starship, but that's just background and I didn't think it had anything to do with the time travel plot device in the movie so I left it out of this post. Maybe I'll deal with it in another post.


"The new movie tells a good Star Trek story."

No, it doesn't. Seriously. I don't see how anyone can even argue the point.

It's a fun and entertaining sci-fi action flick that gives a jolt of energy to a concept that has been eating its own tail for at least a decade and it has a good time playing around with the established characterizations and relationships of Star Trek canon. But that's it. And I suspect that when the "Star Trek Muppet Babies" appeal is no longer enough to sustain the next film, a lot of folks will realize that they've turned the franchise into a sci-fi James Bond.

That's not the worst thing in the world, I suppose, but it's certainly NOT what Roddenberry created.


El Jefe

Great call on "Sorry -- neither!" Lovely moment, especially in that era. Like Emma Peel's legendary "You should see me in four hundred years."

Excellent parry with the spacedock reference. She is indeed a Constitution-class, and perhaps it should be sobering that NCC-1701-E is a Sovereign class? Only the Royal Navy buff in me finds that acceptable.

And, a great non-review review of "Schrodinger's Enterprise." I suppose I came to it with a relatively light heart, just happy to watch Karl Urban do a seance for De Kelley and laugh at the Best. Redshirt. Joke. Ever. Also (thanks so much for reprising one of the two or three best exchanges in TOS from "Babel") Wynona Ryder impressed me far more than I expected as Amanda, even to the point of being someone I could believe (genetically) as Sisto/Spock's mother. The light-heartedness came, in many ways, from a young Kirk I found plausible (nice catch Anne Laurie, and I like Scottish folk music too), and from it **not** being "Enterprise." You want to befoul canon? Take a believable atmosphere and an all-too-human dash of paranoia, but then meet the Klingons half a century too soon, screw up the Romulan War, make the Vulcans too much like their Bush-era namesakes, and nuke the fridge on the entire history of the Federation's development .... As Homer once said, "Urge to kill rising ...." Makes my liver twitch. But no, "Admiral Archer" gets a look in from Scotty because that benighted show saw airtime which makes it canon. No thanks. I will live and die an Old Believer. For the movie, when the weight of destroying George and Vulcan both weighs a little too hard, I can just say that somewhere in the multiverse Deep Space 9 happens in proper episodic order. And remember that the scene when Kirk's hanging off the gangway on Nero's ship is just really freaking cool.

El Jefe


Should add I lost a mouthful of hot chocolate at "Lenny needs a single from his second album." Find a way to work "Bilbo Baggins" into the next movie, *then* I'll be interested ....


Of course Uhura would dig Spock. He plays the Vulcan lute and sings songs about "bitter dregs....ahhhhh, bitter dregs."


>"bitter dregs....ahhhhh, bitter dregs."

So when is Jason Bateman going to call up a reunion tour of this band?

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