No excuse for putting pineapple on pizza

There is such a thing as an edible, nay, delicious meat pie floater, its mushy peas of just the right consistency, its tomato sauce piquant in its cheekiness, its pie filling tending even towards named parts of the animal.  There are platonic burgers made of beef instead of cow lips and hooves.  There are fish 'n' chips where the batter is more than just a white goo lurking at the bottom of a batter casing and you can't use the chips to shave with.  There are hot dog fillings that have more in common with meat than mere pinkness, whose lucky consumers don't apply mustard because that would spoil the taste.  It's just that people can be trained to prefer the other sort, and seek it out.  It's as if Machiavelli had written a cookery book.

Even so, there is no excuse for putting pineapple on pizza.

---from The Last Continent by Terry Pratchett.

Comments

[Daniel]

What? You got a problem with genuine pig product?

[Dave]

In London in 1993, I passed by a pizzeria that had tuna and pineapple pizza. I had to try it.

Better than you'd expect, but still ...

[Rana]

Lance, Lance, you're killing me here, dude! First you slander the noble beet, then you savage by proxy the delight that is pineapple on pizza.

(But forget pairing it with ham. Sausage and mushroom with pineapple is a much better combination.)

[Phil Philiben]

Amen Brother!

[actor212]

Pineapple on pizza is something one might try, and either like or despise. No one that I've ever observed loves it.

For my tastes, I'd rather have Pizza Hut's chocolate dessert pizza, but I have had one or two slices of pineappled pizza (I spend a lot of time eating pizza in tropical locales) that were not repulsive.

[uglymugly]

My mantra, recited whenever polled for a pizza order:

"No fish. No fruit."

Whatever else, those are the elements of a not-pizza.

[Linkmeister]

I'm convinced with no evidence that the initial pineapple and pizza combination was a result of a foul conspiracy cooked up by Dole, Del Monte, and Wolfgang Puck.

[john]

tomato is a fruit so if you say no fruit then no tomato -_-