Studio 60: A glutton for punishment, Ken Houghton returns to wrestle with the devils that torment Aaron Sorkin while live-blogging on the Sunset Strip

Welcome back for the return of live blogging!  I'm not your host, Lance Mannion.  Well, I'm not actually Lance Mannion.  Lance is out for the night.  I'm just a pre-written bit of code Lance has left here to fill in for him for the short bit of introducing tonight's guest host and our special musical guest.  (Scroll down to the post below!)  I guess you could call me the virtual Lance Mannion.

Thinking about it, it's never really Lance here online anyway, is it?  It's just words he's put up to represent him in the virtual world.  You only know the virtual Lance.  I'm not even the virtual Lance then.  I'm the virtual virtual Lance.

And next week, not only will Lance---the actual virtual Lance---not be here but I've got a date. The virtual Lance forgot to make the virtual virtual Lance virtually married.  There's no virtual virtual blonde, so I get to play around all I want, and next week I'm going out with this hot bit of bytes I met in an open thread over at Atrios' place.  So I guess I'll have to hire a virtual me to fill in for me filling in for Lance.  He'll be the virtual virtual virtual Lance.

Good thing there are only a few more episodes of Studio 60 after tonight or this joke could go on ad infinitum.

But I digress.

Let me un-digress.

De-digress?

Dis-digress?

Something.

Like I said, the virtual Lance can't be here tonight to introduce our virtual guest host, the virtual Ken Houghton of Marginal Utility who's returned for one more live-blogging gig.  And since the virtual Lance programmed me with a limited vocabulary---but a flexible one.  You should see me take a Turing Test!  I rock! (Virtual Lance gave me a few phrases that aren't in his vocabulary.  Like "I rock!"  That's how you know I'm not him when you give me a Turing Test.)---so before I use up all my word choices, let me bring out for your applause, amusement, and investment advisement, ladies and gentlemen....

Mister....

Ken....

Hoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooough----

TON!

Thank you, virtual Lance.  Let me clear something up:

We’ve been wrong about Sarah Paulson as Kristin Chenoweth.

Now that I have your attention...

For a brief moment, let us consider the final six episodes of Sports Night, the show that put Aaron Sorkin on the television map (source is IMDB; links go to them):

 
Season 2, Episode 17: Draft Day: Part 1 - It Can't Rain at Indian Wells

Original Air Date: 14 March 2000
The team covers the first round of the NFL draft; Jeremy is nervous about Jenny's visit to the studio.

Season 2, Episode 18: Draft Day: Part 2 - The Fall of Ryan O'Brian

Original Air Date: 21 March 2000
It's the second round of the NFL draft; Jenny visits, and Dan and Casey fight.

Season 2, Episode 19: April Is the Cruelest Month

Original Air Date: 28 March 2000
The network's cutting costs and jobs may be on the line. The staff sit for Passover Seder, and Dan hopes this will afford him the chance to mend a few fences.

Season 2, Episode 20: Bells and a Siren

Original Air Date: 4 April 2000
Natalie has a job interview with Saturday Night Live; Dan hires a publicist.

Season 2, Episode 21: La Forza Del Destino

Original Air Date: 9 May 2000
Dana meets a man with inside information on the sale of the network; Dan and Casey have a job offer in Los Angeles.

Season 2, Episode 22: Quo Vadimus

Original Air Date: 16 May 2000
Rebecca returns, Natalie and Jeremy rekindle their relationship, and the network is sold.

 
Compare these to the capsules Victoria posted here.

The first two brought the Dan/Casey battle to a head, gave Paula Marshall a bit of screen time, and introduced the term "choreoanimator" to the mainstream. The third was Dan's attempt to make up for asking, on a sports show, why anyone should care about sports. The last two were a nice ending, chances for everyone to take a final ("victory") lap around their character, and featured snippy, if not always snappy, writing (Clark Gregg to Felicity Huffman, roughly: "It's a good show, Dana. You'd have to be an idiot not to be able to make money from Sports Night." I want that on Michael Eisner's tombstone.)

And then there's "Bells and a Siren," in which Natalie Hurley (Sabrina Lloyd as Goddess-to- Geeks, a role she later recapitulated to a lesser degree in Sliders and Ed)—who had shown no talent for comedy or comedy writing to date in the series, and whose attempt at moving to the front of the camera was not well received (“about a year away”)—auditions to write for SNL. And blows them away. She’s offered the job on the spot, with a major raise.

With the possible exception of the moment when Peter Krause told Ted McGinley, “You’re wearing my shirt, Gordon,” it is the single most absurd moment with a major character in the entire series. (Feel free to correct me in comments, if you get too bored with the Show at Hand.)

Because over two seasons, we have seen Natalie as being several things: smart, clever, and sometimes insecure. What we have never seen (of the character) is that she is, or can be, funny.

And we realize—if we had any doubt—that, at best, Sorkin doesn’t know the difference between clever and funny.

Sarah Paulson’s biography may mirror Kristin Chenoweth’s, but the character she is playing is Natalie from Sports Night after she “wowed them” at SNL.

And now we have, apparently, the first of a three-part episode that is more likely to be clever than funny. Will it be as pivotal in its way as the two-part “Draft Day” was? Will Bradley Whitford lying to Amanda Peet about hearing a hearbeat last episode become an irretrievable break in their romance? If Tom’s brother gets the Nick Berg moment Jim Tourelott predicted last week, will he suddenly become bitter about having bought all that body armor? Will  D. L. Hughley get laid?  Will  Rob Lowe show up as another Gage Whitney partner?  Will we be able to get through the rest of the season without that damned dolphin-laugh? Can I type anything here that would make anyone care what happens to  Matt that doesn't involve Kari Matchett?  Would we all rather listen to Lulu go Boom Bang-a-Bang?  Can I find the remote before the show starts? And if I just make things up, will it matter?

9:58 - Found the remote; did that baby ultrasound on Scrubs look more like a duodenal ulcer?

9:59 - Over 25 million people watched America's Got Talent last week.  That's only about 23.5 million more than watched Game 3 of the Stanley Cup Finals.

10:02 - Why can't we see The Action Executive?  Ask, and receive! Still drinking!

180/110.  She's virtually dead.  But at least she has a prayer.

10:10 - Sarah tells a joke.  And then regrets causing laughter.

10:12 - Flashback #1.  He's right about the East thing.  The other key to bowtie tying is that it should be off-line, so people know it's not a clip-on.

10:14 - It's a good question.  I know everything I do is try to bother Matt Perry. We probably invaded Afghanistan just for that.

10:16 - Danny Tripp learned everything he knows from the movies.  No wonder he's attracted to Jordan. Or maybe Brian Benben.

They still don't know why her blood pressure is high?  Why are they worrying about the baby?  Not even a Supreme Court Justice could be that stupid, let alone a SportsMed guy.

10:21 We're back.  More alcohol, but Tom this time.

Nice to know Tom cares about the rest.  Aha!  Segue to Afghanistan I.

Are there any women in the room??

Who would ever break a date with her? At least the first one?

K&R.  Wonder if this will cost more than the date with Natalie Kristin Sarah?

One MILLION dollars. Guess so, though what Luke spent in overages that one day should be added in.

The first two commercial breaks included Financial Services companies.  So far, nothing over the half-hour hump more than GEICO. Guess those who switched here from In the Line of Fire gave all their money to Fred Thompson's exploratory committee.

The oatmeal goes away in 2001 as well.  Maybe it's deliberate; they're now pale imitations of themselves. Sorkin's autobiography.

I had almost forgotten that Sorkin is Jewish. From Scarsdale. Where they have regular pogroms.

NBS just p*ss*d away whatever the excess over the $1MM is.  Jack Rudolph, Action Executive, will have to work a few more hours.

Finally: the SportsMed guy treats the problem.

K&R in Latin America has been covered on new shows for years, and we know Busfield pays attention to news while Matt is just catty.

Diana Krall about Oscar Peterson.  Next will be Chris Martin on David Gates.

The ER episode reffed by Culture of Truth.  Deja vu all over again.

Ollie North?

Isn't that a cue line? "There's no way this one goes bad."

10:49 - Jack Rudolph, ACTION Executive!

The drinking has been passed from Jack to Tom to the Man On Duty!

10:50 - Busfield thinking about Sources and Uses of Capital.  But JACK IS ON THE JOB!

10:52 - Just Say No!

10:54 - Yes, I recognized John Hiatt immediately.  It's an Ex-Hoosier Thing.

10:56 - We spend the first part with JR, AE, telling them to be Jewish, and now she wants him to be Christian.  Maybe he needs to try Buddhism.

Any bets on whether, unlike last week, they actually come back with something tonight?

Nope.  Again. Anyone told NBC that lies have to be about something important?

I think I'll make the final word here Dan Coyle's comment.  Don't break the hologram/virtual Lance.  And remember, Man is the Animal Who Laughs.  Though what that makes Aaron Sorkin is left as an exercise.

Good morning, gang.  This is the non-virtual virtual Lance stepping in to thank Ken for doing another bang-up job taking us through Sorkinville and helping us avoid the tourist traps and tip-toe around the local cops.  And thanks to all of you who rode the bus with him and I promise the next time out we'll have a coach with air conditioning or at least one on which the windows actually open.

I haven't watched last night's episode yet.  From your comments it sounds like the subplot that would have amazed me is the one about Jordan and her baby.  Amanda Peet is a brave woman, and Aaron Sorkin is a ruthless bastard, because I can't imagine any pregnant women I've known agreeing to even pretend there was something going wrong and I can't imagine what kind of heartless writer would, on hearing the news that one of his stars was expecting, thinking, Great, we can do a show about how she might lose the baby!

Jim and Jennifer are right.  Saving Tom's brother and Jordan's baby are jobs for Jack Rudolph, Action Executive!

Matt and Harriet's five year argument over religion isn't being played for laughs?  Figures.  But it reminds me of something from PG Wodehouse, and anything that reminds me of Wodehouse can't be all bad.  This is from The Mating Season:

She didn't like him being an atheist, and he wouldn't stop being an atheist, and finally he said something about Jonah and the Whale which it was impossible for her to overlook. This morning she returned the ring, his letters and a china ornament with `A Present From Blackpool' on it which he had brought her last summer while visiting relatives in the north.

That's all for now.  Thanks again, Ken.  Remember, folks, we're going to see this thing right through to the bitter end.  Come back next week for more live-blogging with our guest host, Pen-Elayne, and special musical guest Donovan!

Comments

[M.A. Peel]

On a petty note: I really don't like Harriet's dress. Any of them.

[Ken Houghton]

Harriet's dress in the previous scene looks like Jordan's gown here.

[Dawn]

Ew...Danny kissed Jordan. I'm just a little bit sick to my stomach. Really, I didn't think Whitford was so very unattractive on WW. I think it's the pasty skin with the blond hair. And the horrible personality.

[Jennifer]

"On a petty note: I really don't like Harriet's dress. Any of them."

On an increasingly petty note: oatmeal usually looks best in a bowl, not a dress.

Me-OW!

[Jennifer]

"I think it's the pasty skin with the blond hair."

The cast has been taken over by oatmeal. I think might at least be portrayed by steel cut oats and not instant, but I could be wrong.

[Jim Tourtelott]

Oh, thank God for Aaron Sorkin. Without him, how would any American know that Afghanistan is in Central Asia and does not have oil?

[Dawn]

Interesting that in the 2001 version of the show they had a whole room of interesting writers and cast members. Gray hair bearded guy intrigues me. Too bad we didn't get a show about that show instead.

[Ken Houghton]

The grey-haired guy looks like BRUCE. Not the one appearing in a few weeks.

[Dawn]

Good god, Matt is like a baby in the womb with its cord around its neck!

[Jennifer]

Oops, that was supposed to say, "Danny" up there. Apparently watching this show is turning my brain to oatmeal.

It did dawn on me though why Harriet is so frustrating to me... she is always saying no. Get ready to hit a puppy VG, but it is a common rule of thumb that one must say, "Yes, and..." in order to further a scene (especially in improv). Harriet is usually saying no. If she's so against all they're doing, what is she doing there? I don't buy her being there and that is usually what stops the story for me.

Puppies are now safe.

[Dawn]

OK, I've lost track. Was jack in charge in 2001 too? Is he the longest tenured network exec in history?

[Dawn]

I'm dying here - Cal the TV director knows all the security contractors in the world? And Matt is going to arrange the rescue of the 'airmen'?

[Jim Tourtelott]

Of course Matt isn't going to arrange anything. Matt is a drug-addled weenie, or was as of yesterday. This is a job for Jack Rudolph Action Executive.

[Culture of Truth]

Hmmmmm.....Bradey Whitford was in a famous early episode of "ER" where he played a guy whose wife had preeclampsia.

[Dan Coyle]

"We need Jack Rudolph!!!"

[Dawn]

Yes, that has bugged me about Harriet too. I would think someone in her position would have had to have some enthusiasm for something at some point.

[Dawn]

You're right of course. Matt's drug-addled brain came up with the idea, but it will take Jack to pull it off. Typical writer.

[Jennifer]

"Matt is a drug-addled weenie, or was as of yesterday. This is a job for Jack Rudolph Action Executive."

Now that is a show I could watch!

[Dawn]

I'd like to believe that the military keeps company with and takes crap from all the relatives of captured servicemen, but somehow I doubt it.

"She's downstairs praying her ass off." What a lovely image.

[Jennifer]

I think Jack Rudolph, Action Executive, should have saved Jordan's baby.

[Ken Houghton]

Nice ring. Wrong song.

[M.A. Peel]

Wow. Witnessing a Sorkin meltdown in real time.

[Culture of Truth]

He's got a ring!

[Dawn]

I can't stand wasting John Hiatt music on this couple.

[Culture of Truth]

Maybe they could trade her baby for Tom's brother.

I hear a healthy white baby can fetch a good price.

[Dawn]

Or this couple.

[Ken Houghton]

Rational Expectations doesn't work in the real world, why is Matt defending it?

[Culture of Truth]

Just so we're clear - the cast, and crew, and studio management is all the same from 2002 to 2007?

[Dawn]

ex-Illini thing too I guess!

Ah, let us pause and admire the iPhone.

[Ken Houghton]

But younger and healthier in 2001/2.

[Dan Coyle]

Man, this episode made me want to cry. And not in a good way.

[Ken Houghton]

$60,000 worth of damage at the Sunrise Mall in Massapequa. Not counting the Toyota that did the damage.

The scary thing is that it went through the whole mall, end to end.

[Jim Tourtelott]

I wish Lulu had been the musical guest. Then the music for the engagement scene could have been To Sir, With Love.

[M.A. Peel]

oh my gosh, I'm from Massapequa

[Dawn]

Y'all will have to fill us in on any previews...my tivo switched over to the Daily Show here in the east...

Seriously, if harriet's reilgion is such an important part of her life, how can she be in love with someone who does not believe the same way, and has not changed his position on it one iota in 5 years? Same thing for Matt. I can see that relationship lasting a short time, but on and off for 5+ years? I just can't suspend disbelief long enough to accept that. Any more than I can Jordan being in love with Danny.

Other than that the show was totally believeable.

[Ken Houghton]

End to end of the mall, at dinner time: $60K in damage, only one injury (a woman who fell on broken glass). A staged scene doesn't go much better than that.

Check with your homies, but don't worry about them.

[john]

The religion / no religion arguments are tiiiiresome. So simplistic. No way they keep doing it for 7 years or however long.

I mostly liked this episode though. Melodrama. The song at the end was HEAVY HANDED, but that's the TV convention now.

[ken Houghton]

No; it was heavy-handed when Dawson's Creek used it, years ago. Now it's just inane. (And I'm a Hiatt fan.)

Donovan! Cool; do we get to watch some of his daughter's movies, too? Or even his son's? Something besides "Atlantis," please; the old perfume commercial, or (especially apt) "Epistle to Dippy."

[CattyinQueens]

Guh. I'm sick of Sorkin recycling everything and falling back on his flashback narratives when he wants backstory. I loved Sports Night, but after seeing those jokes and plots on the west wing, I don't want to see them a third time without the gravity of government or the levity of sports. Shut. Up. Sorkin.

The fact that Jordan needed to know the diamond quality before saying yes to the proposal made me want to kick something...good grief.

Oh, and props to Ken for noting the Dawson's Creek use of that song and the implications of using it now in anything. Sorkin and his team (Walden and Schlamme) sure have fallen from 'Eli's Coming' and Yo Yo Ma days...