Lance Mannion

Stay tuned: The heroes of Heroes arrive in the nick of time to save Studio 60 from live-blogging anymore on the Sunset Strip

Flawed and frustrating as it was, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip was the perfect show for live-blogging and it's no wonder those of us who showed up on Monday nights for our regular Snark on Sorkin Fest last TV season had such a good time.

For one thing, while Studio 60 wasn't anywheres close to being a great show, it wasn't all that bad.  It failed, but it failed intelligently.  Week in and week out, things went wrong because some very smart people---producer and writer Aaron Sorkin mainly---made the wrong choices or were too smart for their own good and wrote themselves out of scenes, off the TV screen, and into the op-ed pages, or tried something they couldn't pull off---unfortunately, that was usually comedy---or simply stumbled.

Episodes tended to include too little of something or somebody or too much.  There weren't ever enough scenes for Steven Weber's Jack Rudolph, Action Executive, there was too little of Matt and Danny actually dealing with putting their show on the air, too few plots involving Timothy Busfield as Cal the director, DL Hughley was often close to invisible, and there was too little of the Brit Chick writer until there was too much of her, after she was turned into a mooning love interest for Nat Corddry's inexplicably devastating to women Tom Jeter, of whom there was always too much.  There was too much speechifying and not enough real dialog.  Too much backstory.  Too much current politics that was irrelevant to the plot hammered into the plots.  Too, too much of Edward Asner growling "Macau," a sound that still haunts my nightmares and wakes me up screaming in the night.

There was too much of Amanda Peet being funny ways that undermined her character's supposed authority and competence, too much of her being a winsome little girl lost when her character got swallowed up in Danny's narcissistic obsession with her, which could have been an interesting plot development, except that Aaron Sorkin seemed to think that Danny in full-stalking mode was as romantic and tragic a lover-hero as Romeo or Cyrano de Bergerac.

And of course there was too much of Matt and Harriet's romance, but that was mainly the fault of there being too much of Sarah Paulson who was wildly miscast as a stand-in for Aaron Sorkin's lost love, Kristin Chenoweth, and sadly misused week in and week out as a stick for Sorkin to use to beat up on both conservative Christians and liberals who were as intolerant of conservative Christians as Sorkin himself obviously is.

But the acting was almost always excellent (with one notable exception.  Cough cough Paulson cough cough.) and the production values were top drawer and individual episodes were well-paced and well-directed.  The many characters and the multiple plot threads gave us a lot to follow and root for.  This blog became headquarters for the Jack Rudolph, Action Executive Fan Club.  Just about every episode included several terrific lines and at least one well-crafted scene in which at least one of the cast members got to shine.

So there was always hope.

There was always the chance that if not in this week's episode then in next week's, Sorkin would find his footing, that he would hand off more of the writing to others who wouldn't be as obsessed with politics and Kristin Chenoweth as he was and who would figure out which characters and actors were best to write for, which plotlines were most promising.  I honestly think that if NBC had renewed Studio 60 that's what would have happened.  Good shows have historically taken a couple of seasons to become good.

There were reasons, then, to watch Studio 60 for its own sake and not just to make fun of it.  The show itself has to be enjoyable, at least to a degree, for the live-blogging to be enjoyable.

And Studio 60 gave us lots to think about and talk about.  I don't mean the political and social issues too many episodes sidetracked themselves trying to illuminate.  I mean things directly related to the pleasures of watching a television show, questions about what makes a good story, how is a scene or a plotline developed, what makes for good acting, what can be done by the producers of a show already on the air to correct mistakes that were made at the casting stage (cough Paulson cough) or in the first few episodes.  That last one's a good question for Ken Levine.  I think I'll email him and ask him how he tried to handle that one on AfterMASH.

Finally, though, what made Studio 60 ideal for live-blogging was its biggest flaw---Aaron Sorkin took forever to develop his plots and story arcs.  Whole episodes could go by without the ball being moved more than a yard or two down the field.  This meant that you didn't have to pay close attention to every minute of every show.  You could take your eyes away from the TV screen to look at your computer screen and type your comments and read other people's comments and when you looked back you'd find that you hadn't missed anything important.

You could also miss an episode or three and come back and not be behind.  In other words, since the show didn't require a week in and week out commitment, neither did joining in the live-blogging, which is good, because I didn't want it to turn into homework, for you or for me.

At any rate, I didn't have any solid plans to live-blog another show this season.  I had fun doing Studio 60 and I thought if I could find another show that promised to be as fun to live-blog I'd give it a try.  So I looked over the fall schedule, searching for a show that didn't look awful (Sorry, Bionic Woman), had a large ensemble cast and multiple story lines, was on one of the broadcast networks (not everyone has cable and not everyone who has cable subscribes to one of the premium channels, so as much as I'd like to live-blog Dexter, it along with everything else on HBO and Showtime is out.  Sorry, Mr Wolcott, that does include The Tudors, whenever that returns), and was slotted at a time and on a day when the most number of people could tune in (Ugly Betty's on at 7 Central time, way too early, and it's on Thursday nights when I'm not home and if I was I'd be watching Smallville.  We tape My Name is Earl and 30 Rock).

By process of elimination, but also by the dictates to personal enthusiasm, the only show that I think fits the bill is Heroes.

Good show.  Many characters.  Multiple plots.  Not too deep but not too frothy (which is another strike against Ugly Betty).  Lots of humor, sex, thrills, spills, excitement, and gruesome violence, plus some over the top plot twists and really dumb dialogue.

The only problem I foresee is that if this season's as exciting as last season I may get too caught up in actually watching the show and forget to type about it.

First episode of the new season is on tonight, 9 PM Eastern, 8 Central.

If you didn't watch the show last season and didn't spend the last couple of weeks watching the DVDs nonstop as some people in this house did, don't worry.  You'll be able to catch up pretty quickly.

So join us, please, to find out what's happening to everybody's favorite hero, Hiro, who when we last saw him was lost several hundred years in the past and caught between two charging armies of Samurai warriors...

Studio 60: Last dance, last chance, for romance and love while live-blogging on the Sunset Strip

Well, folks, here we are at last.  The final episode and our last live-blogging together of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip.

No.  No tears.  No tears.

This is a happy occasion.  We're here to celebrate not to mourn.  And we have so much to celebrate.  The fact that Aaron Sorkin is free of this albatross round his neck and can now move on to other projects that will engage his considerable talents more than Studio 60 obviously did.  The fact that Sarah Paulson now knows never to try comedy again.  The fact that we will never, ever, ever again have to hear Ed Asner say Macao.

True, there are losses.  Probably there are no network executives anywhere like Jack Rudolph, Action Executive, which means that there's probably nobody with the brains and the clout to bring back Jack in his own show.  Matt Albi is probably as far from Chandler Bing as Hollywood will ever let Matthew Perry wander, which means that he will never have a part as good again.   And unless he makes a surprise guest appearance tonight, we wasted an entire television season waiting for the return of the mighty Judd Hirsch.

But let us stay focused on the object of tonight's live-blogging.

Getting drunk.

I'm pretty far gone already myself.  I'm not quite in Jack Rudolph territory yet.  But there's an hour of Matt and Harriet singing their love duet ahead of so I expect to be well toasted by the second commerical break.

So, quick, call over your waitresses and order your favorites.  Our bartender's been told not to use any of the cheap stuff and to go easy on the water and soda.

One quick announcement before we begin, though.

There's a rumor going around that I and Aaron Sorkin are the same person and that this whole live-blogging thing has been a way for me/Sorkin to internalize the complaints of all the critics and erstwhile fans and try to work out the intellectual, artistic, and pyschological issues that have got in the way of my/his ability to realize the promise of Studio 60.

That would explain a lot.  For instance, I've obviously been so busy writing about Studio 60 that I haven't had the time or energy to actually write Studio 60's scripts.  All I've been able to do is write the same script over and over again with minor variations, which is how I managed to write a three part episode that moved the ball of the plot from point A to...point A.

It's not true, folks.

I am not Aaron Sorkin.  I mean, look at me.  The white guy Afro.  The shirt unbuttoned to my sternum.  The missing jacket and undone bow tie.  The elephant bell bottoms.  The sweat.

Come on, kids, isn't it obvious?

I'm tonight's special musical guest, Tom Jones.

What's new, pussycat?

Kidding.

I'm not Tom Jones.  I just have Tom Jones Syndrome.  I can't stop singing his songs.  I went to my doctor and told him.  Doc, I said, I can't stop singing What's New Pussycat.  The doc said, Son, you have Tom Jones Syndrome.  I said, is that rare?  He said, well, it's not unusual.

Rim shot.

And with that, ladies and gentlemen, it's time to start our engines.  Live blogging will begin at 9:55.

9:59.  The Office is on.  I forgot.  It's Thursday.  I'm used to doing this on Mondays.  I expected to see Heroes at this point.  I spent the last five minutes waiting for Steve Carrell's superpower to manifest itself.

I probably won't go see License to Wed.

Here we go.  Right now, here on NBC.

"What kind of day has it been?"

Sorkin doesn't really want to know, does he?

Danny and Matt do a great job of ignoring Harriet.  What's their secret?

That's my daughter?

Wow?

Danny feels like a man because he's the father of a baby he didn't actually father?

10:03  They are good together, though.  Matt and Danny, Matthew and Brad.  Good rapport.

I like the name.  Baby Girl McDeer.  And what's wrong if she grows up to be a stripper.  A noble profession.

Ok, rapport or no rapport, we're about seven exchanges past the point when this scene should have ended.

Dire straits for Jordan.

Opening credits with one name credited.  Sorkin's.

Ken Levine would say Studio 60 needs a theme song.  Any suggestions?  What songs were on Hillary's short list?

10:09   Why are we having a concert for Diana?  What anniversary am I missing?

10:10.  Aaron Sorkin thinks we all have short term memory problems.  Danny just recapped to Harriet the plot of the last three episodes, which was recapped in the scene between Matt and Danny.

Go army guy.  Tell Tom to shove it.

Though Tom is showing more grit than he's ever showed.

No grit?  Tom Jeter?  Not much.

10:15.  DL Hughley is trying too hard to hold the screen with Steven Weber.

Relax, DL.  That's how Steve does it.

Wait!  Wait!

Are they about to recap the last three episodes again?

Another flashback?????????????????????

This is K and R Part IV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I forgot.  Do we like Luke at all?

10:20.  We're not going to get a surprise guest appearance by the mighty Judd Hirsch, I know it.

I thought AT&T had turned into Cingular.  I have to keep up with my corporate mergers.  Doesn't matter.  I don't get reception of either one here.

Bill Parcels is working a toll booth?  But didn't his team win the Super Bowl?

Every ad using sports figures makes them look like they've all just snapped a tendon.  The face of victory is the same as the face of extreme morphine-demanding pain.

Age of Love, huh?  That looks interesting.

Happy 21st Wedding Anniversary to Tom and Beryl Watson!

Matt's not an angry young man.

He's a dyspeptic, irritable middle-aged man with a persecution complex.

10:27.  I love the way Weber delivered that honorable guys speech.  And the hand across the brow on honorable guys?  Waving away Simon's supposed idealism.  Brilliant.  What a beautiful portrayal of cynicism.

Sorkin puts in another plug for writers like Sorkin.  Matt is the show.   So this is definitely not SNL.  Or Second City.  Or even Mad TV.  On those shows the cast had a little bit to do with making those shows funny.

Love is never enough.

Are Harriet and Danny talking now or five years ago?

OK.  Mary the Lawyer's involved.  It's now.

10:31.  Karen Silkwood!  Hooray!  Tonight's winner of the Tom Watson Memorial Award for Most Egregiously Out of Date Pop Culture Reference is Danny for Silkwood!

Please, folks, if you care for me at all, don't let me get an iPhone!

There was just an ad for a pizza joint.  Now I want a pizza.

10:37.  Oh, good, we do get to see Amanda Peet.

Baby moment.  Everybody say Awwwwwwww.

10:38.  Irony.  She had the papers ready already.

I like this doctor.  "Yeah, this kid's not going to be under any pressure at home."

Wasn't he strung out the first time they met?

"Hey, this guy is cute when he's flying.  I want him to be the daddy to my babies so he can teach them where to score drugs!"

Drippy piano music.  I mean that.  Literally drippy.  It sounds like rain.  Shrinks play it in their offices to help their patients relax and remember their potty training and the time they saw mommy and daddy "playing."

10:43.  Wes is an empty shirt?  Wes is an empty shirt?  Does that mean the speech that opened the series was pure bullshit?

10:45.  Tom's brother appears again to interrupt our fun.  Life is stern and earnest, says Aaron Sorkin, don't forget our troops.  Don't notice that I distracted you from the Tom plot with the sentimental Danny and Jordan scene followed by the comic scene between Jack and Simon.

A Cialis ad.

I don't like the implications of that.  I feel that I'm in the show's demographic target.  Don't mention ED around me.  It's a jinx.

Wimbledon. Now I get it.  NBC's going to England to cover Wimbledon.  That's why the Prince Harry and William and Princess Di stuff.

10:49.  Happy ending for Tom's brother.  Cheap.  Of course whatever way the plotline ended would have been cheap, because there was no good reason to bring it in to the show except to score cheap points or grab cheap tears.

More rain music.  I'm drifting.  I remember it all now.  I was climbing up on the counter...

What gives Harriet the right to say she's the one person?

Hasn't their problem been that she is obviously not the one person?

Finally!  Aaron and Kristen are back together.

Oh...

Sorry.

"Do you have any problem with Harriet and me?"  Very professional.

Matt and Harriet get to continue their whatever it is they have, but Lucy can't go to Germany with Tom?  Unfair, Danny!  Unfair.  Besides, why does he need Lucy.  Matt writes all the sketches.  Does she have to stay in the country to mope?

Damn.  This show could have been so good.

The clock.  Yep.  Had to end with the clock.

And I'm not live blogging Journeyman.  No way.

I might as well live blog the DVDs of Quantum Leap.

11:00.  And we're done.  Our clock won't reset.  It's over.  Goodbye, Studio 60.

Folks, it's all over.  A happy ending for everybody, except Lucy, who can't go to Germany because she has to stay in LA to mope while Matt writes every line of every sketch.

Thank you all for stopping by.  Thanks especially to all our guest hosts, Shakes, Jennifer and Grizzled, Ned, Ken Houghton, and our triple-threat action blogger, Pen Elayne.

Lights are going out.  We've time for one last round, one last dance, and one last song from our special musical guest.

Goodnight, everybody!

Studio 60: Please welcome our special musical guest...ladies and gentleman, TOM JONES!

Studio 60: Because the gods must be crazy

Turns out that the gods have arranged it so that I'm going to be home tonight to watch the final episode of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip and, although the redoubtable Ken Houghton has offered to take on the live-blogging chores for a third time, I'm going to take the controls myself tonight.  I started this party and I think I should be the one to finish it.

And party's the right word.  The show itself has never been the point of the live-blogging for me.  What I've enjoyed is the virtual parties that get thrown in the comment section.  It's been lots of fun and I want to thank all of you who've contributed or just stopped by to lurk.  What I'd like then is for tonight to be our farewell party.

Everyone's invited.  Even if you've never watched the show, even if you've given up and wild horses couldn't drag you back, even if you have no plans to watch tonight, and even if you've steered clear of these live-blogs before, please stop by here after 9:45 PM EST and comment away.  Comment on whatever.  Feel free to ignore those of us watching the show and start a coversation on some other topic, leave a link to a song, boost your own blog, boost a pal's, or just keep us updated on the ball scores.  Just, please, stop in and at least say hi.

See you tonight.

Studio 60: Ladies and gentlemen, once again, Miss Peggy Lee!

Studio 60: Pen-Elayne braves rogue housepainters, out of control drapery, inexperienced waitresses, and a seemingly endless three part story line to live blog on the Sunset Strip

Welcome back, folks.  I know you're all anxious to bring Pen-Elayne back out here to pick up where she left off last week, continuing the work Ken Houghton began the week before chronicling the first of the 99 parts of Aaron Sorkin's penultimate Studio 60 story arc, and get her started on tonight's live-blogging, but before we do, a few announcements.

We tried to keep this out of the papers, but many of you probably heard that our former manager had a nervous breakdown on the air last week.  We were much concerned at the time, but it turns out he was faking.  It was part of his plot.  What really happened is that while he was on stage, his accomplices were cleaning out the safe in his office.  He absconded with several thousand in cash, some of our guests' jewelry, and three of our best waitresses.  While we deplore the robbery we have to admire him for that last part.  Previous managers have managed to get out of here with only one waitress, Betty, our sous-chef's daughter, and they've always sent her back.

If you've seen our sous-chef you'll know why.  Betty's a chip off the old block.

But last week the manager left here with three waitresses in tow, one of them Betty, of course, and we expect her back shortly.  The other two were good looking and actually pretty good waitresses too and they were tough to replace at short notice.  But we've managed to hire some new girls and we have a new manager who is determined to make the old place over, which is why we're asking you to excuse the mess.  The painters will try to work around you as quietly as possible and the decorater says she'll have the drapes hung and her crew out of here by the first commercial break.

This explains why when she does come out here Elayne will be wearing a hard hat and coveralls.  Everybody's been pitching in trying to get the place ready for tonight and Elayne is wizard with a power roller.

So please bear with us and try to be patient with the new waitresses and no pinching!  They're all just out of the convent.  Thank you.  To make up for it, first round of drinks is on the house.  No shoving at the bar!

That's all.  Once again, Lance wishes he could be here with us in the comments, but you know how it is.  With great power comes great responsibility and Doc Ock was sighted climbing the Chrysler Building.

Ladies and gentlemen, Pen-Elayne!

Damn, just stepped in the spackle again.  Shows you how my day has been going.

But of course as bad as it is, it never seems to be as bad as that of the poor, poor, rich cast members of Studio 60, both the show and the show within.  You have to admire poor rich Aaron Sorkin for trying to make us care about these highly-paid executives and performers by throwing all this tsuris in their way.  "What tsuris," you ask?  "What's tsuris?" you ask if you're not from the coast.  Well, it's not my job to give you either Yiddish lessons or synopses, it's my job to, apparently, be a handywoman; besides, Lance has helpfully provided the link above to catch you up on Amanda Peet's pregnancy (she gave birth, as did her character Jordan, who hasn't been seen since and is rumored to be heading to that great Sorkin waiting-for-the-next-show room in the sky) and Simon's hauling off at the pressparazzi and Tom looking all cutely mopey over his brother's hostage situation, and actual conversation between Harriet and Danny that kept me awake more than the conversations between Harriet and Matt ever did, and of course the continuing adventures of Jack Rudolph, Action Executive Transvestite (™ and © Ken Houghton), who is poised to do a little K&R before we all do some R&R.  Which I'll need after this is done.  Tell me, oh tell me it'll be done tonight!

And with that, let's paint the town red!

9:50 PM - Oh good, an Office marathon.  Can't go wrong with those!  Get well soon, Jenna Fischer!

9:53 - "...when my mom moved in with Jeff... and once again, it's my job to fix it..." oh man, Steve Carell is so brilliant he almost makes me want to see Evan Almighty.

9:57 - Aaaand the obligatory iPhone ad.  I thought it would be more current with the YouTube cross-plug, and have that "dramatic chipmunk" playing...

9:59 - Well, when you get to high-five an elephant, where do you go from there, really?

10:01 - They're still "story so far"ing the first episode in this so-far-three-parter... oh good, at least it was brief.  Makes you wonder, if they can synopsize that quickly, wasn't all that much going on...

10:03 - Excellent -- Jack Rudolph, Action Synopsizer!

10:04 - Go Simon, don't you apologize!

10:05 - "You're fi-- oh dang, I need a drink."  Okay, I liked that little Action vs. Action chat.

10:06 - Is it just me, or does no hamburger in a fast food ad ever look appetizing?

10:08 - "A Brady took a Brady's life..." "...comin' through the rye..." Sorry, I just liked the actor's put-on accent in that soap opera ad.

10:09 - Ah good, Jack's got his alcohol.  Love where he got it from!

"You can spar with me as much as you want."  Yes please!

10:12 - Bill Maher shout-out!  Topical!

10:14 - Oh dear, that wasn't exactly sotto voce, Matt, was it?

10:15 - No, no, no, Holly Hunter impressions were cute last week and just inappropriate in the faux hospital faux environment, Harriet.  Tch.

10:16 - You know, Sorkin really could kill off Jordan.  But the audience would be pretty pissed.  It's not like Peet asked for it or anything.

10:17 - What does "doing a little Juliet Lewis" mean?  I mean, is there a Mini Me version of her somewhere?

10:18 - Yes, Simon looked great backlit like that.  Almost as though he were still on a TV show.

10:19 - He has a house in Hawai'i!  Poor, poor rich man!

10:20 - Ooh, Army guy suspects lawyer gal.  Way to skulk, Mary!

10:23 - Okay, this pharmaceutical gets rid of cholesterol.  Doesn't that mean it gets rid of "the good chol" as well as "the bad chol"?

10:24 - "Why is America's Got Talent the number one show?"  Where do I begin to answer what's wrong with that question?

10:26 - You know, a camera shot through a door AND blinds is a bit much for my eyes at this hour.

10:27 - Okay look, the "vinyl record" distraction was just superfluous and not believable.  So, stop it.

10:29 - "All just a little bit of history repeating" doesn't segue easily into Jason Alexander "five years ago."

No, "away homer" is what A-Rod hits when the Yanks are in Colorado...

10:30 - We're not ever going to actually see a single line of this so-called dangerous sketch from five years back, are we?

10:32 - Another complication for Jordan?  Well,of course, it's only halfway through...

10:33 - Not for nothing, but with all this stuff going on with Jordan shouldn't there be more than one doctor?  I mean, there would be in real life but they don't want to pay more than one guest actor maybe...

Oh yeah, prayer, that'll help.  I actually think the Holly Hunter impression was a better idea.

10:35 - Geez lady, next time you want to drive a Beemer just buy shoes without heels.

10:37 - Is anyone else sensing ANY forward movement?  Gah, this is like swimming through molasses.

10:38 - Excellent, Jack and Matt schmoozing.  We're going back five years again in a moment, aren't we?

10:39 - Oh yes, telling hysterical reactionaries they're hysterical reactionaries always works.

Aaaand right on time, five years earlier.  Why did Wes go into the hospital and get sicker?  No wait, that's Jordan in the present, never mind.

10:40 - Ooh, talk radio looks pretty on a televised computer!

10:41 - A Foo List?  Good thing we have the Foo Fighters!

10:43 - Oh god, PLEASE let there be a resolution of SOMEthing now that Army guy's phone is ringing!

10:44 - Nooo, that wasn't a resolution either.

10:46 - Where's the Pacing Fairy when you need her?  Seriously, it's all soooo slooooow that I find myself drifting off with nary a care about these characters.

10:49 - Wow, Harriet's being real brave reminding us again that these characters are all poor, poor rich people!

10:50 - Danny Tripp, Action Something-or-other!

Wow, he walked out of the chapel.  Pretty good.

10:51 - Just two drunk guys talking... heh, Simon's on a roll again.  But really, don't write an apology speech when you've been drinking...

10:53 - Yes, true patriotism really is that fragile.  And yes, it's 7th grade social studies stuff.  I miss 7th grade social studies.

10:54 - Well, looks like there's gonna be a part IV.  I'm so not here for that one!  Seriously Lance, this is really tough.

10:55 - Mary's bad hair is the most real thing about this show so far.

10:56 - Ghoulish?  This whole storyline is ghoulish!

10:57 - She's. Not. His. Daughter.

10:58 - Danny on his knees was fairly predictable, but a very very weak ending.  Unless he was praying for a resolution, in which case I think we should all join him.  Won't you pray with me?

My father, who art in heaven and has been for the past few months, I know what you'd say.  "What are you wasting your time with this?"  Well, it's kinda fun, Dad.  Anyway, is there some way you could maybe get Matt and Danny back together again in the present time?  Or, you know, find me something else to watch?  Yeah, I know, the Yankees are playing again tomorrow, and at least baseball has a resolution as long as it's not an All-Star Game.  Anyway, off to watch The Daily Show, so y'all are on your own.  No, I have no ending either.  Y'all should be used to that after these last few shows...

Thank you, thank you, thank you, Pen-Elayne!  Wasn't she great, folks?  And how about the way she handled the scaffolding collapse at the 10:24 mark without missing a beat?  By the way, the painter's assistant's going to be fine.  Just had the wind knocked out of him.

Elayne, before you go, could you give that wall in the men's dressing room a second coat of callalilly?  Thanks.

We have to clear out a little early tonight, folks.  Usually the bar and the dance floor would remain open all night.  But the building inspector was in and he's claiming we have several code violations and we have to bri---go over some things with him.  Careful on your way out.  Those wires are live.

By the way, Betty's back.  She reports that the cops caught up with her and our former manager just outside Osceola.  She and her dad, our sous-chef, had a tearful reunion, as usual, and then they settled down to watch the last few innings of the Yankee game together, which made them happy because they're Red Sox fans.  Sox are now ten and a half up on the Yanks so as far as Betty and her dad are concerned tonight had a happy ending.

Not so those of us who watched Studio 60 who are now left to wonder if Sorkin could finish a walk across the room let alone a story line.

We'll find out next week what plots and subplots get closed and what ones will stay open forever or until he gets another new show to use to work out left over issues from his days on Studio 60 the way he's used Studio 60 to work out issues left over from The West Wing.

Goodnight and thanks again, Elayne!

Elayne?

Oh jeez.  Will somebody help her get that bucket of paint off her head?

Studio 60: Ladies and gentlemen, tonight's special musical guest, Miss...Peggy...Lee!

Studio 60: Stay tuned

Pen-Elayne will return tonight to live-blog the penultimate episode of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, 9:50 PM or so EST.  Surprise special musical guest will be here at 9:30 to warm things up.

Note to our patrons:  Studio 60 Live-blogging at Lance Mannion is under new management.  All new menu items, all new lower prices, same great service, same cozy atmosphere, same long lines outside the ladies rooms.  Sorry about that.

Studio 60: Ladies and gentlemen, once again, Glen Campbell...and John Hartford!

Studio 60: Determined to see this thing through to the bitter end, Pen-Elayne takes to the keyboard once again to live blog on the Sunset Strip

Welcome back, folks, for another edition of live-blogging Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip with guest host Pen-Elayne and special musical guest, Glenn Campbell!

Before we bring Elayne out here, the management would like to remind you that the management isn't here again tonight.  Management has other things to do.  Management says those other things are none of your beeswax.  But Management wishes it could be here.  Management promises it will be here in spirit.  So don't get any ideas just because Management isn't here you're free to go wild.  Management will know.  Management will always know.  You can't escape the watchful eye of Management.  Management is a lot like God that way, except that God dresses better and doesn't need to take a crummy job like the one Management has.  Management thinks God thinks he's all that and a bag of chips.  Management has a few words it'd like to say to God.  Management, however, is a coward and won't say boo to God, if you want the truth.  Management won't say boo to Pen-Elayne either.  Management warns you not to say boo to her either.  Management requires you all now to put your hands together and say Yay for Pen-Elayne!

Ladies and gentlemen...Pen-Elayne!

AAAAAH!

Oh sorry, I tbought someone said "boo" and I had that automatic fright response.  Which is, I hope, not to be my reaction to this evening's Studio 60.  I do have a lot of trepidation, though.  On the one hand, it's kind of entertaining to see Sorkin write about something with which he's obviously comfortable (people shooting the breeze -- but seriously -- about geopolitical minutiae) rather than something about which he has shown us he doesn't really care all that much (the ostensible subject matter of Studio 60).  On the other hand... yee-ick, that's a hell of a one-two pathos punch, y'know?  Will the baby need to be ransomed before Jordan marries Rob Corddry (that's Nate's brother, right?)?  Confused?  You will be!

Live blogging will start around 9:50 PM Eastern.  Thanks again to the absentee Management, which I'm really used to by now in my own day jobm, about which never you mind.  See you later...

9:50 - Okay, it's later.  When last we left our intrepid cast, they were doubtless wondering what roles, if any, they're going to play in Sorkin's next project, rumored to be about a misunderstood television writer with Something To Say (Brad Whitford and Steven Weber are both up for that one, I hear) and his wacky but supportive sycophants who spend their time laboriously explaining why it's important to have Something To Say while they walk real fast down corrid-- oh, you've heard that one already.

Okay fine, for reals: Jordan's scheduled for a C-section to alleviate the sudden convenient symptoms she wasn't feeling until late last episode, and Jack Rudolph, Action Executive Transvestite (that's ™ and © Ken Houghton) was attempting to get Tom's captured brother and his airmen buddies D&C'ed... no wait, PDQ'ed... oh yeah, K&R'ed.  Which nobody's ever heard of except millions of liberal bloggers, but never mind all that now.  When in doubt, Action Executive goes where governments fear to tread; take that, Jeb Bartlett!  (This would have been over in like 15 minutes on West Wing, wouldn't it?)  Harriett and Matt are bantering and arguing through the years (props to Sorkin for being a little more deft in his time-jumps last week), and we'll probably never know what's up with D.L. Hughley's character's love life.

9:55 - JD's mental voice isn't as funny on the rerun.

9:58 - Although I still like "Mousse! And a twist!"

10:00 - That's a damn strange Wendy's ad.  "Hot juicy burger" indeed.  It doesn't even look appetizing.

10:01 - I wish these musicians wouldn't listen to their XM radios with their eyes closed whilst sitting in the driver's seat of their Lexim.

10:03 - Okay, here we go.  "Doesn't have to be good, just has to be on."  Way to CYA, Sorkin!

10:04 - Yikes, my friend Randy's wife just had this attached-placenta thing.  Fortunately mom and newborn son are doing fine now.

10:05 -  "These are the calming influences" made me chuckle, I'll admit it.

10:07 - "Things are moving fast tonight."  My husband's response: "About bloody time too."  I dunno, I think I'll reserve judgement.  He's led us down this primrose path before.

10:09 - Yes yes, iPhone.  "This is your email.  This is your music. This is your iPhone on drugs.  This will cost you 500 bucks and that's not even including your monthly charges."

10:11 - Wow, The 4400 is still on?

10:12 - Aaand we're back.  Oh excellent, Danny meltdown.  Hot juicy burger!

10:13 - "Is there anything you need from me?"  Five thousand comeback lines struggling to get out...

10:15 - Nate Corddry is danged impressive.  I like the other actor in the scene too.  Very good gallows-type humor.

10:16 - Lucy, you really don't want to read any more.  Those darned blogs!

10:17 - Second major chuckle of the night, on the baby's weight...

10:17 - Lucy should really not have read Pajamas Media.  I mean really.  I can't even believe liberal bloggers read that, even if it's just to make fun of it.

10:18 - He walked in, with matted down hair!  Oh no he di'int!  Oh yes he did!

10:20 - Now see, that 6-years-ago writers' room was actually interesting.  Maybe because they were reading papers and not surfing Pajamas Media?

10:23 - I'm already sick of Princes William and Harry.

10:25 - Alas, there's never any news on J. Lo, I could have told him that.  It's all crap anyway.

10:26 - "I hate being irrelevant."  Oh, you'll get used to it, Aaron...

10:27 - I like the nurse's "Isn't that like a man" bit.  Third chuckle.

10:28 - Why doesn't he just ask her how to get an ID bracelet?

10:29 - It occurs to me we haven't actually seen a lot of Harriet-and-Danny one-on-one.  Or, like, any.  This was interesting.

10:31 - Ooh, what does Jeannie know about the pajama people?

10:33 - Oh dear.  I'm scared about Jordan too.  And I have absolutely no emotional investment.

10:35 - It all "sounds scarier than it is."  It's just a TV show.  Hey wait, didn't they sort of promise things would be moving fast tonight?

10:40 - Okay, the time travel transitions are a little worse tonight than they were last week.  And give Harriet a break, she does a cute Holly Hunter.

10:42 - A sketch mocking Karl Rove is about as pro-American as it gets.

10:43 - I don't like the Absent Wes storyline in the past scenes.  We've never been shown this guy is all that and a bag of chips, and I don't feel like taking that at face value.

10:45 - He's got her back?  Whose got his back?  (Wow, I didn't think I'd be able to use a line from Superman.  Thank you, weird brain!)  I dunno, the parallels here are dangerous -- just as Danny ought to be warned not to care about this newborn girl, we have to push ourselves to care about the characters.  And it's getting more difficult, because we know they won't be around much longer.  Only... well, only 15 or so more minutes, in my case.

10:49 - Ah, that's better.  Der Hasselhoff!  And Dame Osborne?  Oh dear.

10:50 - Good scene, with Tom wanting the "estranged" speculation corrected.  There's as little chance of fixing that as getting the Pajama People a brain, or a heart, or courage.

10:52 - Another backwards time-jump.  This is not making me nostalgic for a time before some people thought Bush wasn't stupid, you know.  Although it is making me nostalgic for West Wing.

10:54 - It's 10:54, there's obviously going to be a Part III.  At this point I can't differentiate between mullahs, muftis and Muslims, so I'm glad someone else is going to do this next week.

10:56 - Ouch, that's a great Simon scene.  And rang very true, the paparazzi finding his little hiding place...

10:57 - And one mention of Jack Rudolph, Action Executive... but who cares, Simon's ON, baby!

10:58 - "Now we have a whole new story."  Oh good, because it's not like they were moving forward with the current one or anything.

Okay, I'm out of here for now.  Pray for Jordan, pray for Tom and his brother, pray for Simon's wonderful mouth, pray for or with Harriet, because even if you believe prayer is fictional, well, so are they all.  Back to you, Lance!

Studio 60: Ladies and gentlemen, tonight's musical guest, Glen Campbell!

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Studio 60: Programming note

Pen-Elayne will return to live-blog tonight's episode of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, 9:55 PM EST.

Dress is casual.  There will be a cash bar.  Be prepared to show ID at the door.

Ladies and gentlemen, once again...Lulu!

Studio 60: A glutton for punishment, Ken Houghton returns to wrestle with the devils that torment Aaron Sorkin while live-blogging on the Sunset Strip

Welcome back for the return of live blogging!  I'm not your host, Lance Mannion.  Well, I'm not actually Lance Mannion.  Lance is out for the night.  I'm just a pre-written bit of code Lance has left here to fill in for him for the short bit of introducing tonight's guest host and our special musical guest.  (Scroll down to the post below!)  I guess you could call me the virtual Lance Mannion.

Thinking about it, it's never really Lance here online anyway, is it?  It's just words he's put up to represent him in the virtual world.  You only know the virtual Lance.  I'm not even the virtual Lance then.  I'm the virtual virtual Lance.

And next week, not only will Lance---the actual virtual Lance---not be here but I've got a date. The virtual Lance forgot to make the virtual virtual Lance virtually married.  There's no virtual virtual blonde, so I get to play around all I want, and next week I'm going out with this hot bit of bytes I met in an open thread over at Atrios' place.  So I guess I'll have to hire a virtual me to fill in for me filling in for Lance.  He'll be the virtual virtual virtual Lance.

Good thing there are only a few more episodes of Studio 60 after tonight or this joke could go on ad infinitum.

But I digress.

Let me un-digress.

De-digress?

Dis-digress?

Something.

Like I said, the virtual Lance can't be here tonight to introduce our virtual guest host, the virtual Ken Houghton of Marginal Utility who's returned for one more live-blogging gig.  And since the virtual Lance programmed me with a limited vocabulary---but a flexible one.  You should see me take a Turing Test!  I rock! (Virtual Lance gave me a few phrases that aren't in his vocabulary.  Like "I rock!"  That's how you know I'm not him when you give me a Turing Test.)---so before I use up all my word choices, let me bring out for your applause, amusement, and investment advisement, ladies and gentlemen....

Mister....

Ken....

Hoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooough----

TON!

Thank you, virtual Lance.  Let me clear something up:

We’ve been wrong about Sarah Paulson as Kristin Chenoweth.

Now that I have your attention...

For a brief moment, let us consider the final six episodes of Sports Night, the show that put Aaron Sorkin on the television map (source is IMDB; links go to them):

 
Season 2, Episode 17: Draft Day: Part 1 - It Can't Rain at Indian Wells

Original Air Date: 14 March 2000
The team covers the first round of the NFL draft; Jeremy is nervous about Jenny's visit to the studio.

Season 2, Episode 18: Draft Day: Part 2 - The Fall of Ryan O'Brian

Original Air Date: 21 March 2000
It's the second round of the NFL draft; Jenny visits, and Dan and Casey fight.

Season 2, Episode 19: April Is the Cruelest Month

Original Air Date: 28 March 2000
The network's cutting costs and jobs may be on the line. The staff sit for Passover Seder, and Dan hopes this will afford him the chance to mend a few fences.

Season 2, Episode 20: Bells and a Siren

Original Air Date: 4 April 2000
Natalie has a job interview with Saturday Night Live; Dan hires a publicist.

Season 2, Episode 21: La Forza Del Destino

Original Air Date: 9 May 2000
Dana meets a man with inside information on the sale of the network; Dan and Casey have a job offer in Los Angeles.

Season 2, Episode 22: Quo Vadimus

Original Air Date: 16 May 2000
Rebecca returns, Natalie and Jeremy rekindle their relationship, and the network is sold.

 
Compare these to the capsules Victoria posted here.

The first two brought the Dan/Casey battle to a head, gave Paula Marshall a bit of screen time, and introduced the term "choreoanimator" to the mainstream. The third was Dan's attempt to make up for asking, on a sports show, why anyone should care about sports. The last two were a nice ending, chances for everyone to take a final ("victory") lap around their character, and featured snippy, if not always snappy, writing (Clark Gregg to Felicity Huffman, roughly: "It's a good show, Dana. You'd have to be an idiot not to be able to make money from Sports Night." I want that on Michael Eisner's tombstone.)

And then there's "Bells and a Siren," in which Natalie Hurley (Sabrina Lloyd as Goddess-to- Geeks, a role she later recapitulated to a lesser degree in Sliders and Ed)—who had shown no talent for comedy or comedy writing to date in the series, and whose attempt at moving to the front of the camera was not well received (“about a year away”)—auditions to write for SNL. And blows them away. She’s offered the job on the spot, with a major raise.

With the possible exception of the moment when Peter Krause told Ted McGinley, “You’re wearing my shirt, Gordon,” it is the single most absurd moment with a major character in the entire series. (Feel free to correct me in comments, if you get too bored with the Show at Hand.)

Because over two seasons, we have seen Natalie as being several things: smart, clever, and sometimes insecure. What we have never seen (of the character) is that she is, or can be, funny.

And we realize—if we had any doubt—that, at best, Sorkin doesn’t know the difference between clever and funny.

Sarah Paulson’s biography may mirror Kristin Chenoweth’s, but the character she is playing is Natalie from Sports Night after she “wowed them” at SNL.

And now we have, apparently, the first of a three-part episode that is more likely to be clever than funny. Will it be as pivotal in its way as the two-part “Draft Day” was? Will Bradley Whitford lying to Amanda Peet about hearing a hearbeat last episode become an irretrievable break in their romance? If Tom’s brother gets the Nick Berg moment Jim Tourelott predicted last week, will he suddenly become bitter about having bought all that body armor? Will  D. L. Hughley get laid?  Will  Rob Lowe show up as another Gage Whitney partner?  Will we be able to get through the rest of the season without that damned dolphin-laugh? Can I type anything here that would make anyone care what happens to  Matt that doesn't involve Kari Matchett?  Would we all rather listen to Lulu go Boom Bang-a-Bang?  Can I find the remote before the show starts? And if I just make things up, will it matter?

9:58 - Found the remote; did that baby ultrasound on Scrubs look more like a duodenal ulcer?

9:59 - Over 25 million people watched America's Got Talent last week.  That's only about 23.5 million more than watched Game 3 of the Stanley Cup Finals.

10:02 - Why can't we see The Action Executive?  Ask, and receive! Still drinking!

180/110.  She's virtually dead.  But at least she has a prayer.

10:10 - Sarah tells a joke.  And then regrets causing laughter.

10:12 - Flashback #1.  He's right about the East thing.  The other key to bowtie tying is that it should be off-line, so people know it's not a clip-on.

10:14 - It's a good question.  I know everything I do is try to bother Matt Perry. We probably invaded Afghanistan just for that.

10:16 - Danny Tripp learned everything he knows from the movies.  No wonder he's attracted to Jordan. Or maybe Brian Benben.

They still don't know why her blood pressure is high?  Why are they worrying about the baby?  Not even a Supreme Court Justice could be that stupid, let alone a SportsMed guy.

10:21 We're back.  More alcohol, but Tom this time.

Nice to know Tom cares about the rest.  Aha!  Segue to Afghanistan I.

Are there any women in the room??

Who would ever break a date with her? At least the first one?

K&R.  Wonder if this will cost more than the date with Natalie Kristin Sarah?

One MILLION dollars. Guess so, though what Luke spent in overages that one day should be added in.

The first two commercial breaks included Financial Services companies.  So far, nothing over the half-hour hump more than GEICO. Guess those who switched here from In the Line of Fire gave all their money to Fred Thompson's exploratory committee.

The oatmeal goes away in 2001 as well.  Maybe it's deliberate; they're now pale imitations of themselves. Sorkin's autobiography.

I had almost forgotten that Sorkin is Jewish. From Scarsdale. Where they have regular pogroms.

NBS just p*ss*d away whatever the excess over the $1MM is.  Jack Rudolph, Action Executive, will have to work a few more hours.

Finally: the SportsMed guy treats the problem.

K&R in Latin America has been covered on new shows for years, and we know Busfield pays attention to news while Matt is just catty.

Diana Krall about Oscar Peterson.  Next will be Chris Martin on David Gates.

The ER episode reffed by Culture of Truth.  Deja vu all over again.

Ollie North?

Isn't that a cue line? "There's no way this one goes bad."

10:49 - Jack Rudolph, ACTION Executive!

The drinking has been passed from Jack to Tom to the Man On Duty!

10:50 - Busfield thinking about Sources and Uses of Capital.  But JACK IS ON THE JOB!

10:52 - Just Say No!

10:54 - Yes, I recognized John Hiatt immediately.  It's an Ex-Hoosier Thing.

10:56 - We spend the first part with JR, AE, telling them to be Jewish, and now she wants him to be Christian.  Maybe he needs to try Buddhism.

Any bets on whether, unlike last week, they actually come back with something tonight?

Nope.  Again. Anyone told NBC that lies have to be about something important?

I think I'll make the final word here Dan Coyle's comment.  Don't break the hologram/virtual Lance.  And remember, Man is the Animal Who Laughs.  Though what that makes Aaron Sorkin is left as an exercise.

Good morning, gang.  This is the non-virtual virtual Lance stepping in to thank Ken for doing another bang-up job taking us through Sorkinville and helping us avoid the tourist traps and tip-toe around the local cops.  And thanks to all of you who rode the bus with him and I promise the next time out we'll have a coach with air conditioning or at least one on which the windows actually open.

I haven't watched last night's episode yet.  From your comments it sounds like the subplot that would have amazed me is the one about Jordan and her baby.  Amanda Peet is a brave woman, and Aaron Sorkin is a ruthless bastard, because I can't imagine any pregnant women I've known agreeing to even pretend there was something going wrong and I can't imagine what kind of heartless writer would, on hearing the news that one of his stars was expecting, thinking, Great, we can do a show about how she might lose the baby!

Jim and Jennifer are right.  Saving Tom's brother and Jordan's baby are jobs for Jack Rudolph, Action Executive!

Matt and Harriet's five year argument over religion isn't being played for laughs?  Figures.  But it reminds me of something from PG Wodehouse, and anything that reminds me of Wodehouse can't be all bad.  This is from The Mating Season:

She didn't like him being an atheist, and he wouldn't stop being an atheist, and finally he said something about Jonah and the Whale which it was impossible for her to overlook. This morning she returned the ring, his letters and a china ornament with `A Present From Blackpool' on it which he had brought her last summer while visiting relatives in the north.

That's all for now.  Thanks again, Ken.  Remember, folks, we're going to see this thing right through to the bitter end.  Come back next week for more live-blogging with our guest host, Pen-Elayne, and special musical guest Donovan!

Studio 60: Special musical guest Lulu!

Studio 60: The good, the bad, and the ugly Aaron Sorkin

Programming note:  Live-blogging will return tonight at 9:55 PM EST with guest host Ken Houghton and  special musical guest, Lulu!

Update:  To get to the live blogging click here.

Finally got around to the two episodes of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip I had taped and the most important thing that happened out of both shows happened on last week's episode and it was this:  With one smile Kari Matchett as Mary the Lawyer blew Sarah Paulson off the screen and would have, if he'd been there to see it, blown Paulson's character, Harriet Hayes, right out of Matt Albi's life.

This isn't surprising, considering the low wattage of Paulson's performance since the first episode and the fact that Matchett is one of the sexiest actresses to ever work in television and most of her sexiness resides in her smile.  It's important because the fact that Matchett was there as Mary the Lawyer, as opposed to Mary the Writer or Mary the Costume Designer or Mary the Actress or Mary the Studio Page, illustrates everything that was wrong with last week's episode, Breaking News, which itself exemplified everything that's been wrong with Studio 60 since the beginning.

The previous week's episode, The Disaster Show, was the perfect example of everything that's been good and enjoyable about the show and suggested what could have been if Sorkin hadn't written so many scenes like the ones that filled last week's episode.

Well. that confused even me.  Let's try this.  Simpler.  Last week's episode was bad because it was about everything except putting on a comedy show and The Disaster Show was good because it was about nothing except putting on the show.

Mary the Lawyer was on the set at show time---improbably---to ask Matt some last minute follow-up questions for his impending deposition in the sexual discrimination lawsuit being brought by a woman who used to write for the show before Matt took over.  That sentence right there illustrates Sorkin's problem.  He's been continually throwing in all sorts of complicated subplots that have nothing to do with actually putting on a comedy show and which also are occurring mainly off-screen so that the characters have to tell us in long dry expository speeches the details of events we don't care about because they have nothing to do with putting on a comedy show.

As far as she brings any dramatic interest to the show, Mary the Lawyer doesn't need to be a lawyer, because she's only on hand to be another rival to Harriet for Matt's affections.  The reason she's a lawyer though is that Sorkin's main, and too often only, interest in any character is in how that character allows him to pontificate on political and social issues he's in a mood to pontificate on.

So Mary the Lawyer is there to spark discussions about the legal issues raised by accusations of sexual discrimination in the workplace and the problems of women trying to do their jobs in a male-dominated workplace and so on.  The woman suing, who of course isn't a character just a name attached to the discussions, is claiming that she did good work while on the writing staff but the men in charge refused to take her seriously because they didn't believe women could be funny.  You would think then that we ought to be given a sample of her writing so that we could judge whether or not she has a case.  But you'd be making the mistake then that