This one’s for our old friend Chris the Cop, who is actually a retired cop these days, having turned in his badge a few years back for a quieter life in corporate America where the criminals he tracks down are just as stupid but dress nicer.
Chris had been contemplating retirement from the moment his first daughter was born but he was helped towards his final decision by a crook he chased down one night. Actually, he was helped by the chase itself. This mope had held up or tried to hold up a convenience store just as Chris happened to be pulling into the lot in his patrol car. The mope runs out of the store as Chris is getting out of his car. The clerk runs out of the store right after. The clerk yells, “Thief!” Chris yells “Stop!” The mope yells “Oh shit!” but does not stop. He runs faster.
The mope, you should know, is fat.
Not plump. Not husky. Not stout, chubby, or portly. He is not built for speed. He is not built for walking briskly even. But he is motivated.
Chris at this time was a sergeant. He was not old or out of shape but he was not the flash he once was and he is out of practice chasing down criminals. He is a middle-aged guy who has done this sort of thing too many times. His muscles, his legs, his heart, his lungs, and his brain are all telling him, “Call it in. We don’t need to do this anymore.” But his pride is already chasing after the mope, dragging all the rest of him along with it.
The chase does not last long. Maybe it’s a block before Chris catches up and tackles the mope. But by this time the mope is sucking wind like he’s dying, which Chris was thinking he might very well be doing, although he’s frankly not too concerned about the mope’s health because he’s sucking wind too and his heart’s pounding and his legs are screaming “We told you so! We told you so!”
And get this. The mope decides he’s not going to come quietly. He starts fighting. This requires Chris to put some effort into cuffing him.
It is some time after Chris succeeds in this before he can draw enough extra breath to be able to say to the mope, “You fucking moron! What are you trying to do, kill us both with heart attacks?”
From this night on retirement cannot come any too soon for Chris.
I’m sure Chris won’t mind that I told you this after he reads the story from our local paper that follows here, because he can say, “At least I didn’t have to shoot the asshole after letting him take my Taser off of me!”
Officer fires on, subdues suspect in Kingston
At 11:22 a.m., Officer Michael Pedersen spotted the fugitive, Eric Pearson, riding his bicycle at Clinton Avenue and Liberty Street. Pearson, 18, was wanted on a felony warrant stemming from a November domestic violence case.
Pearson immediately began fighting when the officer tried to arrest him. As the two wrestled in the street, Pearson pulled the officer's Taser from its holster and ran away.
He sprinted through backyards for about a block along Clinton Avenue. When he reached 137 Clinton Ave., Pearson sneaked around the side of the house and saw Pedersen in pursuit.
Pearson pulled the trigger on the Taser, shooting its two darts toward the officer. One dart hit Officer Pederson in the left temple, but the other dart missed.
The officer pulled his .40-caliber Glock service pistol and fired one shot, striking Pearson near the left hip.
Note the suspect was on a bicycle when the officer spotted him. Also note the suspect had out-run cops two other times recently. You think, though, this cop’s fellow officers are going to talk about the remarkable foot speed and stamina he displayed catching up with someone fleeing on a bike?
Read all of Adam Bosch’s story in the Times Herald-Record.