Wouldn't it be nice...?

Wouldn't it be nice if we were older
Then we wouldn't have to wait so long
And wouldn't it be nice to live together
In the kind of world where we belong

You know its gonna make it that much better
When we can say goodnight and stay together

Wouldn't it be nice if we could wake up
In the morning when the day is new
And after having spent the day together
Hold each other close the whole night through

The happy times together we've been spending
I wish that every kiss was neverending
Oh Wouldn't it be nice...

Better, hipper, cooler minds than mine have dealt with the National Review's list of the 50 best conservative rock songs.  See Roy,  Amanda, Jon Swift, Zack, Kevin Wolf, and the Philadelphia Inquirer's Daniel Rubin to start.  (Thanks to Susie Madrak for the link to Dan.)

As for me, as amusing as the whole list is, there are only two songs I'm truly surprised to see on it.

One is only a shock because they had the honesty and the nerve to put it on the list.  Sweet Home Alabama.  Conservativism means you hero-worship George Wallace?  You really want to brag about that?

The other is the Beach Boys' Wouldn't It Be Nice.

How conservative is it to celebrate the impatience of a pair of teenagers to escape the authority of their parents so they can go have sex whenever they want?

Oh, I see.  It's ok because the kids want to get married!

This is how hypocrites flatter themselves.  They identify a virtue or a form of good behavior, praise it as if they had just discovered it, deny that anybody they don't like has or practices it, and then congratulate themselves mightily for condemning the people they don't like.

Actually, practicing the virtue themselves?  Of course they do!  Only the children of liberals don't want to get married before they have sex.  Sororities and fraternities are temples to Chastity.

Only conservatives are pro-marriage, and want to have children.  Liberals hate marriage and are anti-family.

From this morning's Times Herald-Record:

They've been together about 10 years now. Together, they bought and completely renovated a 200-year-old house that fronts a beautiful stretch of wetland. They have a lively 20-month-old daughter who's the delight of their lives. They struggle to make ends meet.

Jeanne Vitale and Amy Trippi are everything but legally married. They've gotten as close to being married as New York state allows; they became domestic partners in New York City a couple of years ago. They went even further in 2004 when they were among 25 couples married by New Paltz Mayor Jason West in a ceremony that's still under legal review.

And tomorrow Vitale and Trippi will be among 13 gay and lesbian couples who are plaintiffs in a legal challenge - brought by the American Civil Liberties Union - to the state's Domestic Relations Law. The state Court of Appeals, the state's highest court, is scheduled to hear the case at 2 p.m.

You can read the rest of Jeremiah Horrigan's story here.

Maybe if we think and wish and hope and pray it might come true (run, run, run)
Baby then there wouldn't be a single thing we couldn't do
We could be married (we could be married)
And then we'd be happy (then we'd be happy)

Wouldn't it be nice (ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba)

You know it seems the more we talk about it
It only makes it worse to live without it
But lets talk about it
Oh, wouldn't it be nice...

Comments

[Shakespeare's Sister]

Shakes contributor Zack put up a post about the list of conservative rock songs, too, which contains a line I just adore: "How desperate do you have to be to argue that 'Won’t Get Fooled Again' is pro-conservative? It’s like claiming 1984 is pro-totalitarian, simply because Big Brother wins in the end."

[Kevin Wolf]

You can include me on the list of bloggers on this topic.

I, too, singled out "Wouldn't It Be Nice" as a ridiculous choice for inclusion:

It has never occurred to me, in dozens of listenings, that this song is pro-abstinence. I always figured they were just too young and not yet free of parental control - but hoped to be soon. It's too wistful to be taken as pro-anything.

[Adorable Girlfriend]

Great post! One does wonder how it made the list.

[Mike Schilling]

And "Wake Up, Little Susie". Just what does he think they were doing before they fell asleep?

[Lance]

Why, Mike, they were watching Old Yeller and it made them so sad they cried themselves innocently to sleep in each other's arms.